The Kids Aren't Alright
by Clementine Buttersnaps
Summary: They won the war, but lost everything. Harry is finding it hard to cope, he asks Hermione to erase his memories and give him a new life. Can a promise of meeting again lead to something more between two friends?
1. Chapter 1

**Hello! I'm back for my second Harry Potter story! This is not canon and I'll be changing some facts to fit the needs of my story. If**

 **that's not your cup of tea I understand, but for those willing to stick around, please enjoy!**

 **Title and story inspired by Fallout Boy's "The Kids Aren't Alright" I'm not saying the lyrics fully reflect the story, but the emotion of the song (for me anyway) and this was just sort of born. I could just picture this sad and emotionally tortured Harry, and Hermione having to make the tough choice of making it all better. Everyone should listen to that song, it's amazing!**

* * *

How could this have happened? Everything was going so well, the fight was in their favor; they lured the Death Eaters inside of the castle just as planned. Hoping that getting them in a confined space, while being outnumbered would tip the scale their way.

But how foolish they were to think the Death Eaters didn't have plans of their own.

Hermione had been dueling her masked opponent, she rebounded the curse he sent her, dropping him dead where he once stood. She'd heard a small cry coming from outside the Great Hall, flinging binding curses to Death Eaters in her way, she found a small First Year cowering by the stairs, a tall figure looming over.

Hermione sent his wand flying and then bound him, stopping in front of the girl, who's robes told her she belonged to Hufflepuff. The girl looked to Hermione, her piercing blue eyes clouded with tears. "I- I just wanted to help! My friend Martha ran out of the dungeon to take part and was killed by that Death Eater patrolling the halls. I followed him, but he must have heard me. I'm so, so sorry! I tried to get her to stay like we were told! But she wouldn't listen!" The girl said flinging herself into Hermione's arms.

Hermione gently patted her back with one had and smoothed her hair with the other. "What's your name, dear?"

"Athena Masen," she answered, her bottom lip trembling.

"Let's get you back to the others, Athena." Hermione said, taking the girls small hand and leading her down to the dungeons.

"Please stay put until someone you trust gets you. Can you do that? I need you to make sure everyone stays in here." Hermione said, looking into the girls eyes, speaking gently, but firmly.

Athena nodded her head vigorously before running down the stairs.

Hermione placed a locking charm on the door before running back to the Great Hall.

She snuck in the door and stopped in her tracks; all of the Weasley's, Remus and Tonks had all been frozen by unseen bonds; standing apart from the rest of the witches and wizards who fought with them. Harry was kneeling, broken, before the feet of Voldemort.

"Who shall save you now!" His gravely voice echoed through the room. "Your savior sits, defeated at my feet!"

The unbound people standing to the side had started shouting, trying to advance on Voldemort, but were stopped by the Death Eaters standing in front of them.

"Stand up boy!" Voldemort hissed, pulling Harry to his feet by his hair. Harry, it seemed, didn't even have enough fight in him to cry out from the pain of being yanked up by his scalp. "I want you to see what you've done, if you had just died like you were supposed to, all of these people could have been spared."

With a slight nod of his head, signaling the Death Eaters around them, they all turned and as one, and pointed their wands at their family and friends. Hermione for the first time, was frozen by fear; they were all going to die. How did they not see this coming?

Ron had seen her now, his face wet with tears, blood and sweat; he smiled at her sadly, _'It's ok,'_ he mouthed to her, before he and everyone else was overcome with a flash of green, falling to the floor.

"No!" Harry shouted, running to Ron, touching his neck, finding no pulse he looked to Mrs. Weasley. He fell to his knees clutching her hand, the woman had been a mother to him, and now she was gone.

They were all gone.

Filled with a rage Hermione had never seen him possess before, Harry drew his wand and aimed for Voldemort. But the older man was quicker. " _Avada Kadavera!"_

"Potter!"

Hermione watched in horror as Draco Malfoy flung himself from his mothers arms and pushed Harry out of the way, absorbing the killing curse for himself.

Watching Draco's lifeless body slump to the ground broke Hermione from her trance, she raced to Harry's side, checking with a hope she didn't dare encourage, Draco's throat for any sign of life. Finding nothing, her heart clenched painfully at the gut wrenching sobs coming from Narcissa Malfoy.

"Oh, the mudblood is alive." Voldemort hissed, distastefully.

"Don't touch her," Harry growled.

Voldemort laughed, the sound so haunting, so full of malice, Hermione would never forget it. "Oh, I won't sully my hands with the likes of her. I will however, enjoy making her watch as I drain the life from your body. Shall we end this once an for all?" He asked, his voice devoid of emotion.

Not giving Harry time to respond Voldemort sent a hex his way. Harry dodged it, and sent a binding curse, it wouldn't hold for long; but it was long enough for Narcissa Malfoy to grab her, and bring her to Minevra. Hermione looked into the woman's eyes, so many things she wanted to say, she had just lost her son.

"If my boy felt dying for your friend was the right thing to do, then I can make sure you're safe. Draco's death shall not be in vain," Narcissa kissed her forehead and turned away, running, wand raised to Voldemort, yelling at the same time as Harry.

"Avada Kadavera!"

"Avada Kadavera!"

The green light from their wands was so bright the whole room was engulfed, nothing could be seen.

When things came back into focus, Voldemort lay dead on the floor; Lucius Malfoy was sitting on the ground, his son's and his wife's bodies clutched in his arms. Harry was still standing, rubbing his eyes to clear them.

Everything seemed to happen at once after that, the remaining Death Eaters, having witnessed the downfall of their Dark Lord, and the sacrifice of a broken-hearted mother, stood stunned, not knowing what to do. It gave the prisoners the opportunity to get the jump on them, wrangling them up to wait for the Aurors to come.

Hermione ran to Harry and wrapped him in her arms. "It's over, Harry." She whispered, finally allowing herself a small cry. "It's over," she repeated.

Harry hugged her back, but his eyes were glued to a mass of red hair, all laying together on the floor twenty feet away.

"Almost, 'Mione,"

* * *

The funerals seemed to have gone on for weeks, each as tearfully received as the last.

Hermione found Tonks and Remus' almost unbearable, little Teddy Lupin clung to his grandmother, not knowing what was happening, kept crying for his mummy.

The Weasley's had been hard too, this had been her family for so long, her brothers and sister were now gone. The mother and father she found in Mr and Mrs. Weasley had been taken from her. Her own parents were halfway around the world, it was unclear if she could bring them back.

She was truly alone.

A hand slipped into hers as things were coming to a close, Harry stood there stoically, watching his family being lowered into the ground. Hermione gave his hand a faint squeeze.

She still had her best friend.

* * *

The rebuilding started a few weeks after the final funeral, Harry refused to go back, and Hermione couldn't leave him.

The one night Hermione had of dreamless sleep had been shattered early in the morning, the loud wailing and piercing screams filled Grimmauld Place. Hermione grasped her wand and flew into Harry's room, looking for the reason behind his screams.

The room was empty, save for the thrashing figure of her best friend still sleeping in his bed. His body twisted in painful ways, he screamed as he clawed at the mattress.

Hermione leapt on to the bed and wrapped Harry tightly in her arms. "Shh, Harry. It's ok, you're dreaming."

His screaming had lessened, his body relaxed slightly. "That's it, wake up, Harry." She said in his ear, gently pushing the hair from his face, swiping away the sheen of sweat from his brow. "Harry, you have to wake up." She said shaking him a little when he continued to whimper.

He tried to sit up, but was being held in Hermione's arms. "It's me," she shushed.

He slumped in her arms and began to tremble. "Oh, Merlin, 'Mione, It was awful. He said with a shuddered breath.

"It's ok now, I'm here." She said hugging him, he buried his face in the crook of her neck. Taking deep breaths to calm himself down.

"We were all in the Great Hall, just like it was; but he had you this time. He had Death Eaters hold me and he killed you all one by one, and I couldn't do anything!"

"Shh, I'm here, you don't have to worry about that anymore." She soothed, petting his hair.

"It hurts, when does it stop?" He asked, fresh sobs breaking through.

"I don't know," Hermione admitted, following him in his tears.

* * *

And so time passed, six months of night time battles with their minds; Hermione was fairing better, but only just.

Harry began to numb himself with fire whisky, and turning all of the paintings of Remus, Sirius, and Tonks around, he couldn't take their looks of disproval anymore. If he wanted to piss his life away so be it, a few dead people weren't going to stop him.

And that's how Hermione had found him most nights, holed up in the library, an empty bottle in his hands sleeping in a chair. She was there for him through the nightmares, as he was for her; but he wouldn't hear a word she said when it came to his drinking.

After making sure he got to bed she was determined to talk to him and make him see reason tomorrow.

* * *

Harry slowly made his way down the stairs and was greeted to the sight of Hermione putting the last piece of bacon on a plate of pancakes and setting it in front of his usual seat.

"You're an angel, 'Mione." He said gratefully digging in.

"We need to talk," she said seriously, sitting in front of him.

"Did I leave the toilet seat up again?" He said with a cheeky grin.

Hermione kept her face serious.

"Well, I don't like that." He mumbled, taking another bite of his pancake.

"You've got to stop this Harry, I think it's time you've got some help."

Harry choked on his food. "Help?"

"I've been seeing a muggle therapist, obviously not giving her all of the details, but it's been helping. I think you should consider it." She said softly, taking his hand in hers.

He stared at her for a long moment before extracting his hand and going up the stairs, slamming the door to his room.

Hermione let a few tears slip as she stood from the table to clean up.

* * *

Harry didn't come down for dinner.

He didn't bid her goodnight.

He didn't leave his room.

* * *

Hermione jolted awake when she felt weight dip her bed, she rolled over, wand ready.

"It's me!" Harry said quickly.

Hermione exhaled loudly and put her wand under her pillow.

"Everything alright, Harry?" She asked rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

"I've been thinking, I know I haven't been trying very hard, but I just can't. I can't just pretend everyone we know isn't dead. I can't move on like you." He said, not accusingly.

"You think I've moved on?" She asked incredulously. "I still have the same nightmares you do, I sleep with my wand under my pillow for Merlin's sake! I'll never be able to forget Harry! But what you're doing isn't healthy Harry, I just want to help you."

"I know," he sighed. "I know, I'm sorry I said that. I just- I don't want to remember any more." He said defeatedly.

She sat up fully in her bed. "What are you saying Harry?" She said thickly, already having an idea of where this was going.

He looked at her, his brilliant green eyes so conflicted, so sad. "I want you to do what you did to your parents for me." He said quietly, tears filling his eyes. "I can't do this anymore Hermione, I'm not as strong as you."

"Oh, Harry!" She cried throwing her arms around him.

"Please? I know this is unfair of me, but I just don't see any other way. I just can't anymore." He said through tears. "I see them every time I close my eyes; the Weasley's, Tonks and Remus. Poor little Teddy, I can still hear him crying for his mum. I'm just so tired, 'Mione." He finished, untangling himself from her arms.

Hermione sat there for a moment thinking. She would do anything to spare him pain. Even if it meant her being alone. Harry meant everything to her.

"Give me a few days to get things together, ok?" She finally said.

Harry pulled her into a bone crushing hug in response, his body shuddering with tears. "Thank you,"

* * *

Two weeks later Hermione had everything set, new identity, and a new family.

He would be Harry James Fisher, his new parents were Albert and Irene, they had no family to speak of; and had been trying to have children for almost twenty years.

She had altered their memories, and forged pictures to include Harry at all ages, they believed him to be at Cambridge; he would be coming home for a weekend visit. She would be taking away all memories of magic from Harry. Taking his wand and leaving it in his room at Grimmauld Place.

"You're sure you want this? I can't take it back." She asked, her voice wavering at the end.

"I am, I'm so sorry, 'Mione."

"I know you are," she said hoarsely. "But- but before you go, I want you to know something. I know you won't remember, but I'll never forgive myself if I don't tell you."

Harry took a step closer, and took her hands in his. "You can tell me anything."

Hermione nodded her head, tears finally spilling down her cheeks. "I want you to know how much I love you, Harry Potter. I've always loved you," she whispered, her voice becoming heard to hear, the emotion in her voice making it quiver.

Harry pulled her into his arms and kissed her hair. "I've loved you for as long as I can remember, but I can't give you what you want, not anymore."

She nodded her head into his chest. They had both been broken, him more so; he's had the weight of the world on his shoulders since he was a young boy. "I know, but I just had to tell you."

Harry slowly pulled away from her, cupped her chin and gently brought his lips to hers. "Promise me you'll find me then,"

"Ok," she answered through a new wave of tears.

Harry stepped away from her, ready to be free from his pain. "Goodbye, 'Mione, I'll see you soon, yeah?"

She gave him a small smile. "Yeah, I'll be seeing you."

She raised her wand

* * *

AN: So for some reason I could t upload the whole thing, this was meant to be a one shot, I'll post the last half soon!


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for returning to the second half!**

 **Things look lighter this time around**

* * *

"Do you think this is a good idea, child?" Minevra asked as she stirred her tea.

"No, but it's the only way I can be with him." Hermione said sipping her drink.

After Hermione had erased and reconstructed Harry and the Fisher's memories she had gone to the new Headmistress to tell her what she had planned next. And while Minevra had always known- she does have eyes you know- that Harry and Hermione had feelings for one another, she wasn't sure if this was right.

"But, you'll be lying to him. What if he wants to meet your family? What if you marry and have children? Would you deny them their heritage?" She asked not unkindly, but in a tone that a mother would use for her child, with love and concern.

"To be honest I haven't thought that far ahead," she said nervously. "I thought maybe perhaps I could introduce things slowly to him, he won't regain his memories of the events, he'll know his story but hopefully not the horrible feelings that come with them."

"When are you planning on going to him?" She asked, still unsure, but she trusted Hermione's judgement. She was the brightest witch of her age after all.

"He should be arriving at the Fisher's any moment, they think he's coming home for a weekend visit. I'll need some time to get papers and documents in order. I'm not sure how long it will take." She was anxious to see him again. But what if this new Harry didn't like her? He will be at a university with lots of pretty girls, what if her preparation takes too long and he's seeing someone? She needed to put those thoughts to rest, single or not, Harry was her best friend and she needed him; in any capacity he could offer.

"Well, you have my well wishes. I do have one request, if I may make one." Minevra asked timidity.

"Anything, Professor."

"If, or when, you reintroduce Harry to who he is, I would very much like to see him."

"You'll be the first," Hermione said, turning to hug her former teacher.

"Please, do take care of yourself." Minevra said when Hermione retreated, wiping at her eyes

"I'll try my best," Hermione replied, wiping at her own eyes.

* * *

Harry was running late for his last class of the day, but if he didn't get some caffeine there is no way he'll make it through professor Wilde's lecture.

He bumped into someone coming out as he's going in, sending the persons coffee down the front of their coats.

"I'm so sorry!" He cried squatting down to pick of the now empty cup, the person knelt next to him.

"No, I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention, I'm running late to class." A sweet sounding voice says.

Harry looked to the person next to him, the woman is trying to combat the liquid with those cheap napkins that don't seem to absorb anything, effectively spreading the mess everywhere.

The woman looked up at him and smiled, the joyful smile made her face glow, her honey colored eyes dance with amusement, her almost wildly curly hair flows around her shoulders. She is stunning.

Her smile slowly widens, "You're staring," she says, her voice is musical, and Harry has been rendered stupid. She laughs softly, jarring him from his staring.

"Oh, sorry. You're very beautiful," he blurts, making the woman blush. "I mean, uh, I'm Harry," he says thrusting his hand in her face, startling her and knocking her on her bottom. She laughs loudly, while he looks at her in horror. He's such a dolt.

He stands up and gives her a hand. "I'm so sorry, I don't know what's come over me!" He says taking some napkins off the counter and dabbing at her white coat, which is probably ruined now.

The woman is laughing boisterously now, lightly slapping his hands awake from her chest. "Harry. Harry- Harry! It's ok." She says taking the napkins from him and wiping herself off.

"Oh, God, you must think I've escaped the loony bin."

"No harm, I hated this coat anyway." She said with a smirk. "I'm Hermione by the way," she says putting her hand out.

Harry takes it and shakes it eagerly. "I'm Harry," he says nervously.

"I know," she smiles, "you mentioned that before you knocked me on my bum."

Harry winces, "I am so sorry about that. Let me buy you a new one." Hermione with a smile, nods in acceptance.

After paying for her coffee they exit the cafe and head to campus. "You said you were late for class, which professor do you have?" Harry asks, sipping his coffee.

"Winters," she replies. Harry hardly suppressed his laugh. "I know, she's dull, I'm glad I wasn't given Wilde, I hear he's absolutely dreadful."

"I'm on my way there, hence the coffee." He says, shaking his cup for emphasis.

"Oh, poor you," Hermione says with a giggle.

Harry can't seem to get enough of her laughter or smile. He needs to see her again. "I don't think buying you another coffee could fully make up for me embarrassing you back there, you should let me take you to dinner for starters."

Hermione looks at him, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "Oh, I should, should I?"

"Yes," Harry nods, sounding very serious.

"Ok, have you got a number?"

"Ok? I mean, yes, I do, here." He pulls a note pad out of his bag and hands it to her after writing his number down.

Hermione writes hers and give him the paper. "I'll see you around Harry," she smiles at him and they part ways.

"Bye," he says softly.

Professor Wilde's class suddenly wasn't so boring that day.

* * *

Harry woke up the next morning with a brief pang of familiarity, he had the most strange, and beautiful dream. Hermione had been there, along with a room full of people, but the faces were blurred and he couldn't make out any details; all he could see, all he could hear, had been Hermione.

He knew he had to see her, and soon. He had asked around campus, few people had seen her before, but most had great things to say about her. There was just something about her, he couldn't place it, but he needed to see her.

It had taken him most of the afternoon to pluck the courage to call her, but his nervousness was rewarded with her melodic voice. "Ello, Harry. I didn't think I'd hear from you so soon." She finished with a brief chuckle.

Harry smiled at her words, it took him a second to realize that he hadn't spoken yet. "Yes, I hope this isn't a bad time?" He asked after clearing his throat.

"No, it's perfect timing actually, I was just about to go to dinner with some friends, but they've bailed on me. I've got a reservation for four, but I'm sure we can change it to two, no problem."

Harry had been stunned, was she asking him out? Surely he was misunderstanding her.

"I'm sorry, was that too forward?" She asked, her voice sounding timid.

"No!" He swallowed, and laughed, trying not to sound so desperate the next time he spoke. "No, I was actually calling to see if you were free tonight."

"Ok, how about we meet at The Nines at 7?"

"Yeah, sounds great."

They said their goodbyes and hung up.

* * *

Harry was nervous again, he had never been to The Nines before, but he knew he wasn't the type to frequent there. He wasn't a hipster and he wasn't some douche bag who was out to find women. The restaurant/club was upscale, but a little seedy. He wondered why Hermione would want to go here with her friends, she didn't seem the type who came here. Then again, he had only known her for five minutes.

She was waiting for him when he neared the entrance, if he had been distracted by her beauty yesterday, he was rendered completely useless now. Her hair was in a more manageable state, swept up in a high ponytail. Her makeup was natural, but the deep red hue of her lips gave it a dramatic flair, she wore black skinny jeans and ankle boots. A flowy white tank top and a fitted black jacket finished her outfit.

"Hermione, hi, you look gorgeous." He said, his face coloring at his brazen admission.

Her cheeks tinged crimson "Thank you, Harry. You look very handsome this evening as well. Not that- uh, not that you don't look handsome everyday, you looked very nice yesterday." She said, stuttering and turning even pinker the longer she spoke. It was utter adorable to see her so flustered.

Harry gave her a wide smile. "Shall we go inside?" He asked, gesturing to the door.

Hermione closed her mouth and nodded her head, accepting the arm he held out for her.

After explaining things to the hostess and changing a few things around, they had a small table in the corner of the lounge.

They made small talk, both of them rumbling on with nerves.

"I've never been here before," Hermione said awkwardly.

"Excuse me?" Harry asked sipping his water.

"I've never been here before, my friend, Maggie was dumped yesterday and she wanted to get an ego boost and get hit on by slimy blokes who can't hold their drink." She said with nervous laughter.

"Oh I hate when slimy blokes hit on me, probably why I've never been her either." He said making her laugh harder.

"Thank you for that, I just didn't want you to think I frequent places like this."

"Wouldn't dream of it," he said tipping his glass at her.

The food had arrived and they paused in their talking to eat.

"I hope," Harry started after they finished their food. "I hope I don't ruin things, and send you running away screaming, but I had the strangest dream about you last night."

"Oh?" Hermione asked, her face growing slightly paler.

"Oh, no, no, no, not- like _that."_ He corrected quickly, waving his hands frantically.

She laughed, but it sounded forced, he wasn't remembering was he?

"I was in some large room, I could tell people were in fancy dress, but I can't tell you what they looked like. All I could see was you, you seemed a bit younger, but you were beautiful. You wore a pretty dress and you danced with me." He drank some of his water. "See, not weird. Well maybe a little weird, I haven't known you long enough to have dreams about you. Not that I dream of my friends often." He cut himself off with a sigh. "I'm buggering this up, aren't I?"

Hermione started laughing, "You tell me, this is the first date I've had in ages!" She continued giggling, only getting louder when Harry joined her.

"Is it weird to say that I feel like I've knowing you for a long time?" He asked after they calmed down.

Hermione took a drink of water, "Perhaps we were good friends in another life?" She asked, a twinkle in her eye.

"Maybe," he agreed.

"Listen, Harry, I like you. Would you like to go see a film tomorrow?" She asked confidently.

"Only if it's something terrible and we can throw popcorn at the screen." He said smirking at her.

"I'm sure there is something there that fits the bill," she said chuckling.

Harry walked her home that night, and after a very chaste kiss on the cheek, he promised to call her tomorrow.

He walked home, pondering the mystery of Hermione. He knew there was something about her, he felt like he had seen her before. Her laugh was familiar, teasing the back corners of his mind.

Harry Fisher was a patient man, and he had every intention of figuring this lovely woman out.

* * *

 **Whew! It's over!**

 **I don't really have plans on expanding this, I may think of a one shot some time down the line.**

 **Thanks for reading!**


End file.
